This past weekend I met an old colleague of mine, who have recently retired from the highest positions in the company we used to work together. I used to look up to him for his exceptional leadership skills and the fact that he could always find a solution to every situation that would make everyone happy (a superpower in my opinion).
After catching up on our news, i felt the need to tell him how much i admired him, and that I was always certain about the successful path his career would take.
His reply surprised me: "I spent 30 years of my life completely absorbed and committed to a job I thought i loved, trying to climb up the business ladder, drunk by the recognition of my circle, of the society. Not once did i wonder whether all these made me really happy. I was so busy chaising the man ahead of me. And at the finish line, when i retired, there was nothing there to complete me". The conversation didn't end there but it made me think this:
STOP COMPAIRING YOURSELF TO OTHERS!
While trying to compete with others you will lose yourself. You will lose the chance to explore your inner needs and wants. You will lose the chance to reach your very own highest potential.
Are you willing to make this sacrifice? Are you willing to lose the opportunity to achieve your own dreams, because you had no time left from trying to achieve other people's dreams?
THINK AGAIN! Time flies and you will be retiring soon, wondering about what you could have become, what you could have accomplished, how you could have lived...
Photo by A. L. on Unsplash
The positive results of being optimistic in our daily endeavours and challenges are undeniable. It is however a fact that no one can remain positive at all times, especially in today’s world where everything is changing very fast, where our daily life has become so complicated with so many factors to consider before making the simplest of decisions.
Positive people are very often accused of not being realistic, of facing specific circumstances without evaluating all related factors, of deciding intuitively without analysing the situation to the maximum possible degree.
Positive people are often confronted from their inner circle about not taking situations as seriously as they should be, about not giving the appropriate attention to circumstances/issues/problems, about being naïve, thinking that everything will work in their favour. And more often than not, positive people are challenged and they themselves challenge their positive perspective in life.
Are there any positive people that are never affected from the never ending pessimism that the media and our social circles carry and spread? I believe that even the most positive people do get affected to some degree. Even the experts on positive thinking and optimism have times when they question the certainty of positive outcomes.
But the question is not whether you fall in negative thinking or not. The question is how fast you get out of it. Because the more you think of these negative thoughts, they expand, they create roots and they can transform the biggest of all optimists, to the biggest of pessimists.
So, how do we remain optimistic at all times?
SEE THE BIG PICTURE
In our daily lives we all face minor or even major setbacks while trying to achieve our goals, while trying to create our ideal life. It is inevitable. What happens within a day however, does not ruin our whole life. And what happened today is not permanent, since it can be reversed by the way we decide to react to it. The optimist understands that he/she gains nothing from complaining about whatever it is that is already a fact, but he/she can gain everything by reacting in the best possible way to it, in order to define the outcome of the whole situation. The optimist believes in the power of his actions and decisions, while the pessimist fears his/her “bad fortune”.
A SINGLE MISTAKE DOES NOT MAKE YOU A FAILURE, A MINOR SETBACK IS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD
We all make mistakes, we are only human. However, the optimist sees them as lessons or as minor unfortunate incidents, while the pessimist sees them as proof of his/her inability/bad fortune or whatever he regularly blames for what happens to him/her. These mistakes or setbacks are usually the reason why a pessimist stops trying or working towards his goals. On the other hand, the optimist understand that these mistakes bring him closer to achieving whatever it is he/she wants to achieve.
REALISE THAT NOT ALL INFORMATION IS AVAILABLE TO YOU
The fact that there are times that we do not see a solution to our problems is a major reason to be drowned in pessimism. We ought to realise however that we do not have all the facts available to us at all times. We might have all the facts that are based on past events, on our current situation, but we never know exactly what the future holds. And the future could be brighter than we can think!
SURROUND YOURSELF WITH OPTIMISM
What surrounds us is usually another defining factor on how optimistic we are, or how fast we get out of a pessimistic phase. If out social cycle is filled with people that think that everything is black, it will be very difficult for us to be anything different. If there is currently something in our daily life that inevitably creates negativity, and we choose to stick around it we will never get away from it. However, if we choose to distance ourselves from people and situations that do not add up to our optimism and positivity, if we choose to look “outside the window” and see the opportunities ahead of us, a “few feet away” from our current situation, we can have a better chance at remaining optimistic.
In the end, we are the masters of ourselves, our moods, our reactions, our feelings, our situations. And this alone should make us optimistic. It is in our hands, to do anything, either big or small, either now or as soon as possible, either alone or with some help from anyone available to help us, either a good friend, or a life coaching professional.
Stelios specializes in coaching you through your personal and professional lives. After many years of experience in many fields, as an employee, as a manager, as an entrepreneur, and involvement in many sports including athletics, basketball, volleyball and muai thai, he became a professional coach in his quest to find a way to help people. He considers his love for life and people to be his niche. His vision is to make the world a better place through helping people achieve their full potential and achieve extraordinary results"